I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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