he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You ate ashes out of my bong
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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