Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard

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(917): My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard http://tfl.nu/zt1l

Replies (19) Good night (3263) Bad night (795)
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(269): View more from Michigan

Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.

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(269): Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option. http://tfl.nu/dknj

Replies (22) Good night (6436) Bad night (1237)
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(804): View more from Virginia

The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.

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(804): The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in. http://tfl.nu/awzl

Replies (12) Good night (8514) Bad night (1092)
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(512): View more from Texas

I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.

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(512): I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me. http://tfl.nu/y2u9

Replies (10) Good night (983) Bad night (3250)
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(210): View more from Texas

The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.

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(210): The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him. http://tfl.nu/79ut

Replies (9) Good night (5027) Bad night (1257)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.

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(508): Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole. http://tfl.nu/xgp0

Replies (5) Good night (2354) Bad night (760)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.

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(303): Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans. http://tfl.nu/out8

Replies (5) Good night (1520) Bad night (505)
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(264): View more from Anguilla

I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.

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(264): I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob. http://tfl.nu/tyhu

Replies (9) Good night (2006) Bad night (778)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."

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(248): Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent." http://tfl.nu/u4zv

Replies (7) Good night (1754) Bad night (553)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent

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(651): Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent http://tfl.nu/399q

Replies (5) Good night (1734) Bad night (510)
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(248): View more from Michigan

So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."

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(248): So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits." http://tfl.nu/x9en

Replies (6) Good night (2540) Bad night (717)
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(320): View more from Minnesota

So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?

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(320): So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing? http://tfl.nu/5f4v

Replies (3) Good night (416) Bad night (274)
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(407): View more from Florida

We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...

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(407): We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup... http://tfl.nu/u3jq

Replies (1) Good night (300) Bad night (752)
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(313): View more from Michigan

He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album

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(313): He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album http://tfl.nu/c2eb

Replies (0) Good night (599) Bad night (365)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah

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(504): Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah http://tfl.nu/mugp

Replies (2) Good night (259) Bad night (449)

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