She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize