Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
