but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
someone owes me an orgasm
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
