A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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