You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
