we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
