so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
