I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize