I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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