So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
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Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
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I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection