Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
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At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
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All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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