i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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