ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
