ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We talked him into tasing himself.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
