i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Its about making memories worth repressing
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
