Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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