She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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