somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
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He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
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i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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