Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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