Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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