Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
