wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Randomize
