one might say we're banned from that church
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
