It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
