Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
