Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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