Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
How does one acquire holy water?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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