Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize