we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize