Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
