look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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