if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
