Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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