Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
