drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
the raccoons are back...
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