The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
