On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm too high and old for this...
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
