If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
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