I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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