In the future we'll all be gay
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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