I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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