I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
