Sponge bath it is.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
