I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Best friends brother. Beat that.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
