So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
