sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
