Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot

  (586): View more from Michigan

  That was very cool/italian of you

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving

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  (586): You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot (586): That was very cool/italian of you (586): Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving http://tfl.nu/l4rm
  Replies (11) Good night (1865) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.

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  (212): I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew. (503): Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word. http://tfl.nu/4en3
  Replies (26) Good night (5555) Bad night (624)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.

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  (805): My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years. http://tfl.nu/zmw5
  Replies (18) Good night (3817) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.

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  (901): She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A. http://tfl.nu/01sf
  Replies (43) Good night (1826) Bad night (5682)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.

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  (860): I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage. http://tfl.nu/q50p
  Replies (17) Good night (4356) Bad night (1932)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics

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  (513): i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics http://tfl.nu/sgxc
  Replies (9) Good night (4205) Bad night (1050)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  She even gives head with a lisp.

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  (407): She even gives head with a lisp. http://tfl.nu/76cl
  Replies (17) Good night (2393) Bad night (4715)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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  (513): I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means? http://tfl.nu/ni5g
  Replies (12) Good night (4067) Bad night (954)
• Favorite

  (276): View more from Virginia

  Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.

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  (276): Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco. http://tfl.nu/65bb
  Replies (3) Good night (656) Bad night (1525)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?

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  (202): I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right? http://tfl.nu/xedt
  Replies (3) Good night (719) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.

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  (940): Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them. http://tfl.nu/2war
  Replies (13) Good night (571) Bad night (1118)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.

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  (306): you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet. http://tfl.nu/iwag
  Replies (2) Good night (789) Bad night (193)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms

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  (314): Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms http://tfl.nu/dq92
  Replies (2) Good night (522) Bad night (193)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..

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  (573): You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door.. http://tfl.nu/x3ci
  Replies (0) Good night (573) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  If tits could talk, mine would be bragging

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  (+61): If tits could talk, mine would be bragging http://tfl.nu/uf52
  Replies (3) Good night (592) Bad night (206)

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