I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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