Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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